Sometimes we just say yes to things even if we are not fully okay with it. We just want to be the nice, easy going person who everyone likes. We may not be the all-around-pleaser who goes out of her way to get people to like her but we like it when we are generally likeable. It’s easier for us to work towards being that one reliable individual that people won’t have any bad thing to say about.
We can continue being such and there is nothing wrong with that. But what is important to note is that we should be fully okay when we agree to do something, when we say yes to someone. That we are okay with the choices that we make and that we are okay with how people are around us. But being okay with things is not a given. We should not assume that people know this about us. We gotta clearly tell people what we are okay with and what we are not. It is not anyone’s responsibility to make sure that you are okay. It is solely yours.
I have a hard time with this because of three things- I like being perceived as likable, I have a hard time asking for what exactly I need (and generally asking for help), I like to assume that people get it. The good thing is that lately I’ve been more keen to things that I am not okay with and also more self aware of these tendencies I just mentioned. I’d like to make a list of what I am okay and not okay with, then constantly revisit and update it as a tool for lifelong self-discovery.