I have just started listening to Becoming by Michelle Obama. The book is a memoir, a personal account of her experience in the various roles that she has played and continue to play. I like listening to books read by the author themselves. It feels as if Michelle is personally sharing her story with me.
As she recounted her story as a young girl driven and determined to learn how to play the piano, I was struck by a line she said – “I did not know how to deal with flawless and perfection. Because I was not that.” It occurred to me that this is how I am too. Despite the deliberate effort to keep everything together, I will never be the polished woman that I used to aspire to be. I have my own story and that is one marked by brokenness as much as it is imbued with beauty. In short, I will never be fully put together.
More than leaving me with unease, this realisation gave me comfort. That I’ll be okay. I’m fine as I am even if I can never be the most refined person. I actually like my edge. I think that is what makes me interesting and worth having a conversation with. Perhaps I can even sharpen it further, not to be perfect but more as a practice in this ongoing process of becoming and being.